Saturday, June 30, 2012

FF : I Am...FREE Part 11


“Chote?”

Arnav looked angrily up from his laptop...

“You’ve been quiet all morning...well, you’re always quiet, but...won’t you even talk to me anymore?”

He sighed...”I’m sorry Di...I don’t know what to say to you, and I don’t know how to make things right with Khushi...I have to finalize this annulment, but I don’t want to...”

Anjali sat down beside her brother...”Chote...it’s the right thing to do...you need to let her go...”

Arnav stood up abruptly...”Why does everyone keep saying that!”

Nani walked into the dining room...”Because Chote, like Anjali just said, because it’s the right thing to do! You have imprisoned her in this relationship with you...you need to set her free...”

Arnav wasn’t willing to accept.

He turned to face them, the heat flying from his eyes was scalding...

Instead of speaking, he walked away.

….........................

Khushi was now dressed and sitting on the bed.

Her mind was in complete disarray.

Fragmented memories of the previous night were weighing her down...

Yes, she had responded to his kiss...to his touch...

A shiver ran through her body...

Even at the  thought of him near, she...

“No...” Khushi quickly interrupted her own mind...

“No...I won’t accept this...! This CANNOT be love...”

Picking up her phone, she called her Amma...


Garima answered...

“Amma?”

“Khushi!? Oh Khushi we are so sorry for not coming...”

“It’s okay, I understand...You all deserve respect...nothing less, and I’m sorry for bringing  this on you...”

“Khushi! You did NOT do this!”

Khushi’s soft cries were heard through the phone’s speaker...

“Oh...Khushi...please don’t cry...I will come to see you soon, I promise...”

“Amma, I need to ask you something...what...what is love...?”

Garmia went silent.

Khushi waited, and waited...and finally...

“Khushi...love is unconditional. love is endless. love is friendship. love is respect. love is patient. love is constant. love never gives up. love isn’t just a feeling, or an emotion......it’s life...”

silence.

“I don’t know if that has helped in any way...but Khushi..everyone’s love is different...your heart will know...give it time...find YOUR love...not mine, not someone else’s...find YOURS...”

Khushi whispered...”thankyou Amma...” and hung up the phone...

Shaking her head, she said...”Everyone’s love is different? My heart will know?”

Walking over to her cupboard, she took out her journel...

“I will find out what love is...Because all I feel now is...” she let out a frustrated scream...”I don’t even KNOW what I feel!!!”

Khushi began to write...



Love.
What is Love?
Amma said that it is...
No. She said I had to find MY love.

Love.
Love has brought me up...and brought me down...
Love has made me happy...and made me cry...
Do I WANT this kind of love?
Do I need it?
Can I still feel it?
If I do, am I strong enough to try again?
Can I take the extreme happiness and the Devastating lows?

I have loved.
I have hated.

Then I have loved more...I can handle the love, but can I handle the pain again?




Khushi’s eyes slid closed as she relived the depth of Love Arnav showed her only hours ago...”His love captured me whole...His love took control of my senses...”

Throwing the book down on the bed she stood up and paced around the room...

“What is this? REAL love!?” she said clenched teeth...

Sitting back down, Khushi lifted her journal and began to write again...

Her tears stained the paper, as she wrote what was inside her heart...




Love.
Love can be guilty.
Love can break down your defenses.
Love can make you sorry.
Love can make you weak.
Love takes you over.
Love can give you heaven.
Love can make you fly.
Love can make you cheat.
Love can make you a liar.

But...Love is...Life...and I only feel alive when...



And at that very moment, her heart knew what to do.....






...................................




Arnav almost walked straight into NK...


"Whoa...Naanav..."


Arnav paused...his anger flared, but instead, he heard himself say..."NK, I'm sorry..."


"it's alright...you only nudged me..."


Nk was about to walk away when Arnav grabbed his arm..."I mean about...about Khushi...“


He relaxed his hands, which unbeknownst to him had been curled into fists. 


"I love her...more than my life, and she will be free of me by the end of the week..."


NK stared at him. Hard.


"You DO love her..."


Arnav nodded.


"So do I..."


Arnav looked up at NK...and what he said next was one of the most painful things he'd ever uttered..."I know you do...and you are the one who deserves her..."

















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