"What?" Khushi asked breathlessly
Arnav moved in closer, "I said come back to me…I WILL love you the way you deserve…"
And for a moment, her heart softened…
Khushi felt a thaw crack at the ice…
"I…I just…" but a post orgasmic haze started to take over…"I…"
Arnav stopped her, kissing her firmly…
When the kiss ended, he kept his lips on hers, "…sleep…I'm not leaving you…"
She wanted to say so much, but two more breaths had her falling fast asleep.
"He broke Sheetal's fast…"
"That means a lot to a woman!"
"While you were having fun, your wife was passing out in my arms…"
Laughing, screaming, banging on the door…
What was that banging…?
Why is is so loud?
Why is there a funny taste in my mouth?
So much Blood.
"Khushi! Khushi wake up!!!!!"
Arnav was beside himself with panic.
"KHUSHI! Damn it, wake up!" he screamed as he shook her hard…
The moment he saw her shiverring, he moved closer, trying to calm her…
Then when he saw tears coming spilling over her cheeks, his heartbeat began to thud…
Finally, her soft sobs undid him.
"Khushi!" he climbed on top of her and pulled her upper arms to sit her up…"Wake up NOW!"
And she did.
She woke up with a scream.
Her eyes popped open and she shuddered with fright.
But the fear soon morphed into full blown anger.
Her arm reared back and she slapped him devestatingly hard on the face.
Shocked and worried, his head turned with the impact of her hit.
"Get OFF me right now!" She screamed as she scooted away from under him.
Ignoring the sting, he felt no anger as he turned back to her.
"Khushi, it's ok! I'm not angry! I'm not going to hurt you! Think! Think back! This morning we-"
"HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!"
Her vulgar language stunted his brain again.
"How DARE you come back here and force yourself on me! You disgusting-"
"FORCE myself on you!?" with all the power he could muster, he wound his arm around her waist and yanked her back beneath his body, "FORCE!? I may have started without you being aware, but damn it, you responded!"
Khushi started to fight.
She squirmed and pushed…"Get AWAY from me!"
Arnav dropped his body weight onto her…"Khushi listen! You said you were still in love with me! Khushi, what happened!? Did you…" his expression changed…"Did…did you dream something?"
Her arms continued to push, but the flash in her eyes only confirmed what he had asked.
"Khushi, I didn't…argh!"
His words were cut off as she clenched her fist and hit him across the jaw…"You have NO right over me! Just because you suddenly care NOW doesn't me y-"
Arnav cuffed her wrists with his hands and held her arms down beside her head…"No right!? I may have no right to happiness. No right to think I deserve you. But DAMN IT I AM GOING to make sure you are happy!"
Khushi struggled as hard as she could, "Then get away! Get OUT of my life! I can't take this! I can't!"
Her breathing once again began to stutter.
"Khushi, No. listen! I'm SORRY! I said I was sorry! I've lived a whole bloody year without you and I-"
She had turned deathly pale.
"…blood…I remember hearing…hearing that…that there was a lot of blood…"
That horrifying image appeared in his head.
The paramedics pumping her stomach.
Pumping the pills she used to end her life.
And the blood.
Unknowingly, his own eyes began to drip with tears.
And Khushi felt that pain again.
She felt HIS pain again.
"Khushi…Seeing you like that…seeing…I… I just…If I…If I could have put myself in your place, I would have done so in a heartbeat."
"I had to stop the pain…I didn't want to do that…I didn't…I would never…"
Releasing her arms, he held her face gently, "Khushi I know…I know you…you are the most beautiful women I have ever seen…the most beautiful soul…and I am…" he paused, staring hard into her eyes…"I am so so sorry."
His thumbs moved softly over her cheeks.
"I love you. I'm in love with you. And I could not bear another year, another month, another day, another second without you beside me."
She felt as though breaking point was imminent again.
"Okay, okay…" he leaned down, kissing her forehead…"don't think about this anymore…no more…"
Her heartbeat was racing.
He could feel it against his chest.
He needed to change the subject.
"Look, everyone is at our place. Why don't we join them all for lunch? Payal hasn't seen you for days, and I know that-"
His eyebrows lifted, "Really?"
She nodded fast, showing him how badly she was trying to stop the past from resurfacing in her head.
"Please get off me…"
Even though his heart sank, he nodded and slid away…"I've still got my car here, so we can go whenever you're ready…"
She quickly stood up and stumbled…
He was on his feet in an instant as she fell back against him…
Khushi's eyes closed as she let herself enjoy the feel of his arm around her waist once more…
"It's okay…I'm here…I'll always steady you."
Giving her head a quick shake, she pushed away and pulled her nightie tighter around her body…
"I'll just…I'll shower and…and…"
He smiled, "I"ll wait…take your time…"
And as she walked away, she felt her thighs rub together.
"My underwear?" she thought, and just as quickly remembered…
"This is wonderful!" Anjali squeeled with joy
"I've been wanting family time for a year and now, twice in a week!" Payal chimed in happily.
Khushi smiled, but there was an underlying worry that Arnav could see.
All throughout lunch he could see her trying to stop thinking about their morning together.
She would flush when he looked at her.
Her color would brighten when he spoke.
He could see plainly that she was responding to his nearness, but also the past memories of his denial and hurt wasn't far in her mind.
As she exited the baby's room, Payal saw Arnav waiting and squeezed Khush's hand, letting her know she would wait downstairs.
"Can I talk with you?"
Khushi heard his question, but didn't look up.
"Khushi?" he grabbed her hand.
She tried to pull away, but this time, he held on.
"I need to talk with you."
"Fine." Khushi muttered under her breath.
He led her into their room, and shut the door behind them.
Her eyes soon wandered to the bathroom door and she took a step backwards…
Arnav panicked and hurried in front of her, blocking her view…
"I didn't bring you in here to cause you more pain…I want us to move past that…together…"
"No no…" his eyes widened…"No, I didn't mean-"
Taking a decided step forward, Khushi hauled back her hand and slapped him so fast he never saw it coming.
Bells clanged in his skull as loudly.
Spinning around, she tried to flee from the room only to have him run in front of her.
"Khushi…I am in NO way making light of what I put you through. NO. FUCKING. WAY. I will never forgive myself for letting that happen to you."
Her eyes burned as she glared into his eyes…"I tried to end my life over that pain! I hate that! I HATE that I did that!"
He took a menacing lunge towards her and pulled her into his arms…
He held on.
Arnav didn't say a word.
"Let me go! I mean it!"
And she struggled until her strength was gone.
sorry it's short, just trying to update as fast as I can for you all xoxo