FF : I Feel Everything Part 39

"Khushi!?"

Payal's voice echoed throughout the kitchen…

Khushi began to panic, but soon felt Arnav pull her closer…"You're safe with me...remember?"

Taking a deep breath, she relaxed…

Arnav quickly spun their bodies and shielded them behind the nearby wall…

"Khushi?" Payal called out once again…

Arnav simply stared down into her eyes, holding her…

Payal's mobile started to ring and she set the plate she was holding down into the bench with a click…

"Hello?"

"Payal? It's me…"

"Akash...Hi…"

Khushi hadn't heard a word, but was lost in Arnav's eyes…

Arnav however, pulled Khushi closer, and felt his blood start to boil…

"Why have you called?"

"I...I was wondering if you were still coming to see me tomorrow afternoon?"

Payal smiled softly…

Her husband's voice still managed to send her memories back to better times…

"Yes...I will be...so...I will see you tomorrow...okay?"

Arnav's emotions were leaping …

His jaw clenched as Payal spoke with Akash…

But his heart swelled as his wife blinked slowly in his embrace…

When Payal walked back out, Arnav lowered his lips to hers…

"I should go back out and help…"

"Mmmhmm…"

Khushi started to squirm, and Arnav loosened his hold on her…

"I'll let you go and help...but Khushi...I'm not far away…"

……….

The day dragged on, and finally the evening sun began to set…

Khushi and Payal had smiled and chatted as they helped clear up …

Anjali was constantly smiling, loving the new friends and freedom in her life…

Arnav was being hounded by NK when he returned from dinner with his friends…

"Nanav! How did the day go? You know...with babies everywhere!?"

Arnav held back a grin and growled…"that's basically what it was...babies everywhere…"

"Thank God I wasn't here! I mean, I love Di's baby…" Nk smiled and blew a kiss in the direction of the baby's room…"But when there are too many...I mean… basically…"

The rest of his sentence faded out, as Arnav watched Khushi slowly appear from the kitchen and walk up stairs…

He tried to get a clear view of her face, and once he did, he saw her sadness…

Even though NK was still midspeech, Arnav muttered out…"Goodnight NK…" and took off after Khushi…

Shutting the doors quietly behind him, he watched her as she finished dressing for bed...

He couldn't hold himself back from crossing the room to stand behind her and envelop her body in his arms, kissing the nape of her neck tenderly…

"Are you okay?"

Being wrapped in his embrace still shot sparks of fear inside her, but  Khushi closed her eyes and relaxed against him…."Yes…"

"You know I can read your body language Khushi…" he whispered as his left hand began to slide up her stomach…

Khushi's body tingled…

But instead of touching her breasts, he moved his hand to her heart…"Khushi, I know you still have moments when you are afraid…"

Her eyes darted from left to right…"uh...I...I still get nervous and…"

"Afraid of me…"

With a pulse that was now racing, she tried to deny it once more…

"...n...no...I'm…"

"Khushi…" his lips brushed over the line of her neck…"...even now you're scared to tell me?"

Arnav felt angst as her heartbeat sped up once again…

"I love you...I will continue to show you every day...but please...I only ask one thing of you…"

Turning to face him slightly, Khushi brought her eyes to his…

"Your heart is racing, even though I'm holding you...You tremble even though I am with you…"

"I...I'm sor-"

"No…" he shook his head…"you are not at fault...I just want to ask you to try, once again, to trust me...to not be afraid of me...I worked so hard to make you feel safe, to make you feel loved... I am still devastated…"

Khushi's eyes were fogging up as she spoke…"I try...everyday...to not let fear overtake me...I look at you and...and…"

"Tell me...please...talk to me…"

She paused, and Arnav quickly turned her in his arms and lifted her, carrying her to the bed…

Pulling the covers up over her, he propped himself up on his elbow and lay beside her…

Waiting.

"I look at you and I feel everything...I feel fear, anger, hate...but then all those feelings disappear...You hold me and I feel safe...you look at me and I feel happiness...you make love to me and I feel love…"

Arnav wanted to cry, to scream, to howl…

"I don't want to fear you...or to feel anger and hate towards you...but those are the feelings that surface first…"

Her voice broke and she cried quietly…

Arnav moved closer and rested his hand on her abdomen…

Both knew, that even though their recovery from this trauma had progressed greatly, that there was so much more...more to let go of…

"I asked Jiji about Jijaji...I feel so sad that her marriage has had to suffer...all because of...I just…"

Arnav tried to calm her…"Shhhh...Khushi, Payal is a strong woman...like you...and I know she is handling things in her own life…"

"But so much of what I went through was for...for her…"

Instantly he felt a sinking feeling in his gut…

That WAS the threat he had made when he forced Khushi to marry him…

"I'm...Khushi, I'm so sorry...you know I would never…"

Her hand slid up and rested on his, "I know Arnavji...but I don't want her to be unhappy...She loves Akash…"

Arnav stiffened at the mention of his brother's name.

"Khushi, take things one day at a time...remember what the doctor said...don't take on the burdens of tomorrow…"

Blinking her tears away, Arnav leaned down to kiss her…

Before moving back, he whispered against her lips…"Come here...let me hold you…"

……

Khushi had fallen asleep…

They had remained quiet, not willing to break the fragile moment…

She had instinctively sought out the heat of his body in her sleep, and curled up against him tight…

It made his very soul ache…

He wrapped his body possessively around hers and buried his face in her lose hair to inhale her scent, hoping the gentle lull of her heartbeat would send him to sleep…

But a scream of soul destroying terror suddenly raged through the silence and shot a knife through his heart…

"Arnavji!"

Arnav's heart thudded as he heard Khushi's frightened screams..

He bolted upright and pulled her closer…"Shhhhh, Khushi, shhhh...I have you...shhhh…"

Khushi's pulse was racing as hot, stinging tears dripped down her face…

She instantly fell into his embrace and buried her face in his shoulder as loud sobs began to rack her body…

"Khushi...Khushi!" he tried to get her attention, tried to hold her face to look in her eyes, but she clawed at him with urgency…

"Nightmare…" she managed to gasp out…"I...I am...scared…"

"I have you...in my arms...and nothing will hurt your when you are with me!"

She shuddered violently as the memories of Shyam reared up again in her vision…

Lurching and twitching, she moaned…"...the...the pain...it hurts...so much…His hands...on...on me...so much...hate...and..."

Arnav swept in and delivered a fierce possessive kiss to her parted lips as his hand was still pressed to her racing heart...

Arnav swallowed hard when she finally looked up in his eyes...

"I am going to take away this pain from you Khushi…" his words were slow, deliberate, drenched in agony…

A startled gasp flew from her lips as he forced her back down onto the sheets and seized hold of both of her wrists to pin them above her head…

"Arnavji…?"

"Tell me! I NEED to help you! I...I feel so...so bloody helpless! How...How can I ease this pain!? I am yours to command Khushi! All of me...is yours...Tell me how to help you/! I love you!"

Her eyes fell closed as she shuddered…"...that...exactly that...I want to feel your love ...love me...please…"

Gripping her hands with one hand, he tugged at his sweatpants and pulled aside hers…

Arnav lowered his head to cover her lips with his own as he slowly pushed himself inside her tight heat…

He stared down into her wide eyes as he buried his hard flesh inside her, loving the low moan of ecstasy that flew from her lips…

He loved her…

Wholly and Completely…

But still, deep in her eyes was that crippling pain…

And that was breaking the heart he never knew he had until she came into his life…

……………….

7am.

Khushi's eyelids flickered as the sunlight filled the room…

Looking to the side, she was instantly graced with her husband's sleeping face…

Their night had started out rough, but after her nightmare, the way their bodies intertwined, things had suddenly turned serene...

She smiled softly…"...so handsome…"

The minute she spoke, she saw the corners of his lips twitch…

Khushi said…"...you're awake aren't you…?"

Arnav opened his eyes, gazing long and hard into hers…"...so beautiful…"

Her body flushed with heat…

His hand lifted and he gently ran his fingers down her cheek…"How are you this morning?"

Khushi took a deep breath and let out a sigh…"I'm wonderful...how could I be anything but wonderful after last night…"

Arnav slid closer…"but...you had a…"

"I think I had 3…"

His eyebrow quirked…"3?...3 what?...ohhhhh…"

Khushi smiled as he recollected their passion...

“I like you this way, Khushi—soft and feminine...”

“...well...I’m a woman, Arnavji . . .”

“A fact that never fails to escape my notice.”

Smiling, he lifted a hand and cupped her flushed cheek.

Just as she was about to shy away, he hauled her so hard against his chest, her breath whooshed out.

"We're not done yet…"

The glint in his eyes sent a spark of excitement through her body…

Slowly she put her arms around his neck.

Pulling his head down, she traced his lips with her tongue.

He waited, simmering from the heat of her nearness and from the heat of the morning sun.

"I have to help with breakfast…" she whispered…

But the instant she moved, he took her mouth fiercely, savagely.

His tongue slipped between her parted lips and plundered without mercy.

The passion he’d sensed in her erupted.

Small love sounds escaped her lips, and she pressed herself so close, their bodies seemed to mold together…

Arnav was possessed with need and brought his body up over hers, holding her tight...

"Arnavji…" she whimpered as he lowered his mouth to her exposed breast…"I...I have to go and…"

When she tried to push him away, he captured both her wrists in the vice-like grip of one of his hands and pinned her arms over her head.

A tiny whimper welled up from her chest as he closed his lips over the tip her breast.

Tracing his tongue around her nipple, he flicked at it and asked softly, “What makes you think that I would let you go anywhere right now…?”

Khushi drew in a sharp breath at his exquisite torment and smiled as she struggled to free herself.

Her veins surged with emotion.

“I love you so damn much.”

He pulled her closer and she arched her neck for his tender kisses.

His hands roamed her body with a sweet, thorough slowness that buried all thought or decision and left only sensation.

When his touch roamed back to her breasts, their mouths met in a series of hot, hungry kisses that—like all else between them at the moment—soon

slowed into something softer, sweeter.

As he kissed her slowly, he slid himself warmly inside her body...

“Oh...my...yes...” she breathed as he filled her.

He moved slowly over her...letting his body sink deeper with every penetration…

Keeping his thrusts deep and slow, he looked intently at her face…"Whenever you are afraid...run to me...whenever you feel angry...run to me...I promise...PROMISE...that I will be there for you…"

His words aroused her,  tightening her already beaded nipples.

“Come for me,” he said ...

He moved harder inside her and sensed it building, the glorious release.

Her inner muscles softly began to squeeze his flesh and he groaned…

"I feel everything that your body tells me...I know you, and I love you...fully and completely...forever and ever…"

And then it happened, like a sweet explosion, her body shattering into pieces, each of them filling with so much pleasure that they were forced to split again and again, like a tiny atom bomb going off inside her.

He was in awe at the strength of her climax … and began thrusting faster …

And as her body contracted around his, his own body exploded...

She clung to him when the sensations ebbed, clung to him...because  he was the one safe, dependable, loving part of a world gone mad.

Running his hand over her damp hair, he kissed her gently…

"Arnavji...you...you make me feel brand new every single time you touch me...your love breathes energy and life into me…"

She could say no more…she could only clutch at him like a lifeline as he held her tight and whispered in her ear…"Damn, I love you…"

"You do?" she asked quietly…

Regripping her wrists, he yanked them above her…"You have to ask!? Khushi I swear that…"

His words faded as he saw the smile on her face…

"You...are...impossible Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada…"

"I know...you have told me that before…"

She tried to pull her arms away, but he lifted an eye brow and shook his head…"Not yet…"

"Can I ask you something?"

Arnav smiled fully, his heart feeling ecstatic at her wilingness to talk…"You know you can ask my anything…"

"Before everything happened with...you know…and our misunderstand--"

"Yeah…I know..." he ground out…

"...well...why did you dislike me so?"

Arnav softened…"Ah...well…" he lent down and kissed the tip of her red nose…"You made me fall in love with you instantly...and that was something I wasn't ready for…"

Khushi bit her lip…"I thought it was all the embarrassing, stupid things I did…"

Holding her wrists with one hand, he brought one hand down to caress her face…"Not at all...I always found those things...strangely attractive…"

Moving her cheek closer into his hand, she closed her eyes…"So...I didn't ruin to much for you? I mean, your life became so complicated when I came along…"

Finally releasing her hands, he framed her face and held her still…"My life...would have been way more fucked up if you hadn't come into it…"

"But you...you made me do so much…"

Arnav sighed…"I know...I burdened you more than I should have...only because I liked you more than I should have…"

Bringing her arms down, she gently gripped his biceps…"If I had known you liked me, I wouldn't have been so scared of you…"

He lowered his lips to hers, kissing her softly…"I was an idiot...all I wanted was power, and money…"

Khushi wrinkled her nose up…"Hey! Don't call my husband and idiot…"

Arnav laughed…"They say  you can't put a price on love...I am glad...because the amount that I love you, is way more than I could ever afford...even with all the money in the world…"

A bright pink blush began to spread over her and his heart skipped a beat…"Khushi, I know I've made many, many mistakes...but saying 'I Love You' to you...was not one of them…"

………………..

The phone began trilling…

Anjali looked up nervously as she held her sleeping daughter in her arms…

Nani rushed to answer the phone…

"Hello?" she said quietly…

"Nani?"

Anjali's eyes met Nani's and she nodded, letting her know that the baby was still sleeping…

"Akash Bitwa? Is that you?"

"Yes...How are...are you?"

Nani's expression softened…"I am alright...a bit tired...I have been helping Anjali with baby Ruwi…"

"Payal showed me some pictures on her phone...the baby is beautiful…"

An uncomfortable silence stretched between them…

Finally Nani spoke, "I shall call Payal to the phone...take care okay…"

Akash was about to reply, but heard the phone set down onto the table…

He gulped, fearing to reveal what he had called for…

"Akash?" Payal exclaimed as she answered the phone..

"Hello Payal…"

She took a moment, then continued…"Do we have to cancel our meeting today?"

"No...no...I was calling about something else…"

Slight concern began to spread over her..."What's wrong? Has something happened?"

He cleared his throat…"When you come and see me today...um…I'll...I'll be…"

Payal's heart was starting to race…"What? Tell me!"

"I've been granted early parole...I come home today…"

Payal was thankful that she had taken the cordless phone…

Because she fell back in shock against the couch…

"Payal?"

A million thoughts ran through her head…

She had no idea what to feel…

"Uh...I'm...I'm here...I...today? I mean, today?!"

"I will still have to report to my parole officer twice a week...but hopefully, we can try to start living normally again? I really truly want to be with you...and be better for you…"

Payal's heart clenched…

At one time, all she had ever wanted was to be happy with her husband…

But now…

"Akash...I…"

A loud bell started ringing in the background…

"Payal, I have to go...I haven't spoken with Bhai, but I am hoping to right all wrongs I have done...my parole officer will accompany us back here to talk with him…"

Payal nodded, but couldn't bring herself to speak…

"Payal, I love you…"

And the call ended.

………………..

Meanwhile…

Still Upstairs...in another little world of their own...

Khushi and Arnav were still huddled up in their room…

"Ok Mr. Raizada...I need food…" and with that, she rolled out of bed and stood up, pulling on one of his shirts...

Instantly shooting to his feet, he marched towards her,  grabbed her from behind, slid his arms tightly around her, and pulled her firmly against him…

He heard Khushi's gasp of shock and lowered his lips down onto her neck…

Her skin broke out in goosebumps as she felt his tongue rasp along her pulse…

"Arnavji...I…"

"When will you stop calling me Arnavji and just call me Arnav?"

With nerves sparking currents into her blood, she shivered trying to turn in his arms…

His arm tightened round her waist holding her still…"Don't move…"

She whimpered slightly and tried to appeal to him…"Arnavji…"

"Arnav…" Arnav growled…

"I...I will...I'll try and… and call you…"

Her sentence was cut short as he spun her around and backed her up to the wall, letting his body crush into hers…

Whispering against her temple, he said…"You can practice by calling me that when I'm buried inside you…"

Khushi flushed at the memories of his body as it speared inside hers…

Her gaze dropped and her eyes focused  on his lips…

The memory of all the places where his lips had been made the heat in her face deepen…

His arms moved down her hips and pulled her knees up around his waist, baring her sex to his entry…

Repositioning an arm around her, he pulled down the front of his sweatpants and held his hard flesh at her core…

"Arnavji...I...I…"

His eyes zoned in on hers with a glare so fierce it rendered her silent as he groweld…"Arnav…"

Khushi heard his voice, soft and casual, but his eyes weren't casual, they were lethal...

She wasn't sure who moved first, but before she could take her next breath, he slammed his mouth against hers…

Khushi groaned and opened for him…